Consistency is Imperative For a Well-Formed Child
Like Jell-O, a child needs consistent boundaries until they can stand on their own
Young children are like Jell-O – early on, they need a consistent, stable boundary that will hold them, keep them in place. Once the boundary is firm for a time, the form is set, and conforms to the new boundary – even after the restraint is removed. But the boundary MUST be consistently held until set. Like Jell-O, if the boundary is always moved, removed, adjusted, replaced, you will not get the results you intended.
No matter what parenting program, model, theory, or process you take on, if you cannot or will not be consistent with what you put in place, you don’t need to waste your time or money.
Children, from Uterus to University Need Consistency
If you put in place nothing else in your parenting process, start with consistency. Set a consistent bed time and hold to it, if you say no dessert until they finish their vegetables, be consistent, and hold to it. If you tell them, they must stay the whole night in their own beds, don’t cave because you are too tired, and then let them sleep in your bed
Be Consistent!
Consistency is probably the most crucial parenting tool you can have in your toolbox. Without consistency, no other tool, skill, method or theory has any chance of succeeding. Nor does your child! Imagine learning your addition tables, and sometimes 1+1 = 2, and sometimes 1+1=0, or 4, with no reason! You would give up on math, and never try to learn the basic principles.
Is it too late? It is never too late! If you were inconsistent when your children were young, and want to start new rules or boundaries now, it might be met with resistance, but if you persevere, you will be successful!
As humans, we do not like change, and we will always try to push against the boundaries if we have the opportunity. That is why consistency is key! If you intend to implement change, set new boundaries or rules where before there were none, expect to run into resistance. If you are consistent, and firm, you will succeed.
Here are some ideas to help you incorporate consistency into your parenting.
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Don’t try to take on more that you feel you can commit to.
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Start small.
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Pick a small rule or boundary to start and be consistent with it for a week.
When you feel you have established that one, try another. Be sure to use praise, celebration and effective feedback to reinforce your changes. You will find those skills in the Effective Parent’s Toolkit. For now, it is important to be consistent right away.
Young children are like Jell-O – while still unformed (young), they spill out, looking for a boundary that will hold them, once the boundary is held firm for a time, the Jell-O/child is set, and conforms to the new boundary – even after the restraint is removed. But the boundary MUST be consistently held until it is set. If the boundary is constantly moved, removed, adjusted, replaced, you will not get the results you intended.
No matter what parenting program, model, theory, or process you take on, if you cannot, or will not be consistent with what you learn, you don’t need to waste your time or money.
Children, from Uterus to University need consistency
If you implement nothing else in your parenting process, implement consistency. Set a consistent bed time and hold to it, if you say no dessert until they finish their vegetables, be consistent, and hold to it. If you tell them, they must stay the whole night in their own beds, don’t cave because you are too tired, and let them sleep in your bed
– Be Consistent! –
Consistency is probably THE most crucial parenting tool you can have in your toolbox. Without consistency, no other tool, skill, method or theory has any chance of succeeding. Nor does your child! Imagine learning your addition tables, and sometimes 1+1 = 2, and sometimes 1+1=0, or 4, with no reason! You would give up on math, and never try to learn the basic principles. Is it too late? It is never too late! If you were inconsistent when your children were young, and want to implement some of these new ideas now, it might be met with resistance, but if you persevere, you will be successful!
Nobody likes change, and we will always try to buck it if we have the opportunity. That is why consistency is key! If you intend to implement change, implement boundaries, rules, and structure, where previously there was none, expect to run into resistance, but if you are consistent, and firm, you will succeed.
So, here are some ideas to help you incorporate consistency into your parenting.
- Don’t try to take on more that you feel you can commit to.
- Start small.
- Pick a small rule, boundary, or structure to implement and be consistent with it for a week.
When you feel you have established that one, try another. Be sure to use praise, celebration and effective feedback to reinforce your changes. Those skills can be found in the Effective Parent’s Toolkit, but it is important to begin to be consistent right away.
